A Break From All The Love Stuff.

Just when I thought I had all the luck in the world when it comes to graded recitations because I almost never get called, a stupid eraser ruins my fate.

So there I am standing in front of the class with no memory whatsoever of anything that I've read about abnormal psychology, and cursing myself for taking up this course when I don't even know what a clinical psychologist does.

My cheeks are burning, my palms are sweaty, my mouth is dry, and there's nothing I'd want more than to go back to my seat but time couldn't go any slower.

Thankfully, Glad shows me her hand outs and Nina and Chelsea are mouthing some of the answers.

I still find a way to mess up, though. I'm really no good under pressure. :p

But once it's over, it doesn't seem like much of a big deal.

All I know is that I already live in dread of that class.

And Latika. Is. So pretty. :)

Ultimate Crush.

You come forward and time suddenly stands still. A sweet smile slowly crawls across your lips as you start talking and I feel like I've just become oblivious of everything but your presence and my heart throbbing.

I am in awe of your breathtaking beauty that I can barely even register what you're saying so when it's my turn to talk, I mumble and trip over my words and end up feeling like a fool because of what I've just said. You simply laugh about this though, and I learn to love you more because of the delightful sound of your laugh. You say another thing or two, and I try my hardest to reply as casually as I can and hope that you don't notice how smitten I am by you.

Moments later, we're just standing there awkwardly and gazing at each other with nothing left to say. You give out another smile and start to walk away. And I'm left there smiling and elated because you just made my day. :)

Sweet Emoshit.

"Feb 26, 2009

The exact first month of going out. Talking. Loving.

Gave a warranted right to kiss her for the first time. Something I've been stopping myself from since the first day.

The kiss was perfect, but in its sweetest, it has proven one thing: That it's not just the "thrill of the chase." Because the kiss made me want her more. :) Made me wanna be beside her everytime. Made me like and love her like there's no other person worthy of me but her. :)

(It didn't, like the usual, make me feel successful that at last I got her kiss. It didn't, like the usual, make me feel good, but made me fly. It didn't, like the usual, make me feel that i'm done with her.)

Again, it made me want her more, love her more, forevermore. :)"

June 22, 2009

shobe:

rossann: ano yan?

shobe: papansing message. :p

rossann: haha. ang tamad mo namang magpapansin. blankong message lang. oist. 21 kanina. :)

shobe: naisip ko na yan! just didn't get a chance to tell you. 4months na dapat.

I have every reason to stay away from you, but there's just something about you that makes it so hard for me to resist.. Something that makes me want to love you through all the pain and doubts.. So I'm drawn to you, like a little child's finger to the tip of the flame. :)

Blah.

A murmur of voices distracts me so I turn my head to find out where it's coming from. I see you standing on a corner and talking to a friend with that curious expression on your face. For a second, I wonder what the conversation is about but i just shrug it off and go back to reading my book.

Suddenly, I feel a peculiar urge to look your way once more. I give in to it and end up staring at you. You're on your own now, leaning against the wall and absorbed in your own thoughts. I notice that your forehead is furrowed, then I smile at the thought that it always is.

Some memories come rushing back and I begin to feel a nagging emptiness crawling inside me. I try to dismiss this feeling immediately and convince myself that things are better off this way. But sometimes, I just can't help but wonder if you ever miss me like I miss you.

Just as I'm about to look away, you catch me staring at you. You hesitate, then raise your eyebrows and say hi. I just wave back and smile, then turn away and sigh.

:)

I love you because you know your way through me and you understand me immediately.

When i'm at my worst, you hold me and hug me. Comfort me and soothe me. Til my sorrow becomes your own, and i'm filled with a sense of relief in that voice that i've always known.

You see the despair in my eyes and every suffering underneath my sighs. And even without much words spoken, you mend a soul that once was broken. :)

When Love Fails.

When love fails,
There's always one heart that's left bleeding;
One heart that's left hoping;
One heart that's left hurting.
It's the heart of someone who didn't see the circumstances coming.
It's the heart of someone who refuses to let go
Even when there's nothing to hold on to.
It's a hopeful heart that
Should have grown weary and defeated long ago,
But doesn't stop beating..
Wishing that someday,
The love that it holds would be enough
For both hearts to keep going.