Vicious Cycle.

It’s over and you know it. Nothing that you say or do could ever change the fact that she no longer wants to be with you. Yet, your world continues to revolve around her. You live for those fleeting moments when she suddenly comes back and everything returns to the way they used to be; and regardless of how she makes you feel afterward, you are undoubtedly hopelessly, shamelessly, desperately in love with her, and nothing else matters.

It’s not like you haven’t made an effort to stay away from her. God knows you’ve been struggling to forget her, but hard as you try, there’s just no way you could ever live your life without her.

Even if you know that she’s only after you whenever it’s convenient and your feelings for her will never be reciprocated in the same way that you give it, you’re too blinded by your love for her to care. That’s why you just settle for whatever it is that she’s willing to give and pretend that you’re contented with the way that things are between you.

All you really want is to be appreciated and cared for, and at this point, it’s the most you can hope for.

You’ve learned to keep all the worries, hurt, and sadness that are whirling inside you hidden on the farthest corner of your heart just so that they could momentarily vanish while you’re with her. There’s nothing you’re supposed to feel but bliss when you’re around her. Yet, as soon as you part ways, the realization that you are alone and always have been hits you.

Then you ball yourself up, and cry your heart dry.